I have heard that arranged marriages actually have a better long term outcome because of this. I know this is not the time to criticise as the harm has already been caused, but i will still ask: If you claim you dnt love someone, how on earth did u get involved with her, let alone put her in the family way? Falling in love again at 47 and marrying for the second time at 52 was a miracle. The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of What to Expect. @Teejay,hahahahaha, that cracked me up, but coming back to the issue, what da hell???? What is it like to have a baby with someone you don't want to have a Begin speaking about the kids, as well, mentioning different accomplishments they've made lately . How can you discuss your thoughts with her in a healthy way? "We are. Long Story Short, I Don't Love My Pregnant Girlfriend. I Was It's the kind of care for your emotions, feelings, and love. I'm a **** if I lie and say I love her and be with her. He has been nothing but supportive, but I do not love him. Having a baby with someone you don't love advice needed I know she doesn't want to be with me and I stop loving her and I don't want to be with her anymore. That is exactly how I feel about my life over the past 8 years - it feels like I have been sleepwalking. Do you think that she would let you be a father if you two were to split? Either stay or get off the pot but be careful how you play this. But men can still get baby fever. Made a mistake without any intention to make it surely will freak someone out. Unless your girlfriend deems fine that you both do not continue the relationship, by all means. At least you know your decision to not hook up with a guy was definitely the right one if he insults you for it. Your best bet might be to stay with your gf for now, bond with your child and forge a relationship with him/her. Single. When you don't fall in love with your newborn - ABC Everyday As a woman, you get insulted for doing it, and you get insulted for not doing it. In some cases it works, but for many it doesn't. Women, in particular, have a growing awareness of the benefits of having babies when they're ready and not having more than they can provide for. You don't want support, you just want to hear he is a bad guy and you are a victim. First step: Don't rush things. Find out to see whether he actually likes you by taking this quick free quiz. You could have the best partner and tons of family support. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. I too feel torn by a similar situation. I've been with my boyfriend for years and I still don't know if I love him. Why is it when a women gets up the duff it's all her fault? What to Expect has thousands of open discussions happening each day. I don't know if your feelings of disconnection will pass but I sure hope they do. the woman would be unhappy, miserable and resentful as well in the long run for marrying a man who doesnt love her or care if she exists. think twice before sharing personal details, foster a friendly and supportive environment, remove fake accounts, spam and misinformation, delete posts that violate our community guidelines, reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts. (5 kg) or more a year after giving birth, Live Science previously reported. Should you have a baby with someone that you don't love? If you break up right away, she can take the kid and you may miss a lot of the firsts w/them growing up. I completely respect her decision on this. I sacraficed my needs for them. But I don't know if I can be with her for the rest of my life. maybe take a pre-marital class and figure out some common ground to build a relationship on Nine years ago I was mad in love with my first boyfriend. It's not that they don't want to. 9 min read. no one is going to be happy in that relationship. If you've only been together 3 mos, where did you live before you met? Add to Collection. What to Expect supports Group Black and its mission to increase greater diversity in media voices and media ownership. If only i had acted 2-3 years ago when things were simpler and i was a little younger. I dont think Ill be at peace with her in marriage. Please whitelist our site to get all the best deals and offers from our partners. You will love that baby no matter what when it gets here! It's like I've been sleepwalking all this timeI apologize for my rumbling, i really needed to get this off my chest. This relationship is bad for my wife and me. But there's something extraordinary about the energy level of a little boy. We broke up 6 weeks ago and we Ok long story short my girlfriend of over a year was raped by someone that My girlfriend doesn't think I love her, but I do love her. I tried to keep them happy and not see the fighting. Lovers have a fun in comfortable room. I just don't think it's right to bring a child into the world when you can see the end of the relationship. Postpartum Depression and Anxiety: An Open Letter to the Partners So family pressured us to get married. Be strong. Amazed how women can be on these forums. An increasing number of South Korean women are choosing not to marry, not to have children, and not even to have relationships with men. Things You'll Wish You'd Known Before Having A Baby - TheList.com I don't have any memories of them not fighting. What kind of advice do you really want, the best advice would be to take care of your baby, dont let yours and your other half (lool) silly selves to pollute her upbringing. Apply for wic and food stamps and move in with family. not the father, mother or child. She bullied me into a wedding & now I am miserable. Eight women in their 20s, 30s, and 40s spoke to Insider about their decision to be child-free. For many, it was an easy decision that often came down to a gut feeling and the common refrain that. We are two total opposite people. One slight problem I don't love her! You moved into his house, you let him buy you a car and you quit your job because he was financial there. Apparently that first year of raising the child is very stressful, specifically on the relationship. He bought it and it is in his name. **** will get tough before it gets better, but it will work out in the end. Best wishes for a lifetime of happiness. People don't know he has a daughter, which tells me he's not proud of her, or truly claiming her in any way. It is something i always knew deep down but i never acted on it. Take this advice as if your life depends on it. She got pregnant 3 months after meeting him. I think it's so hard for me to love this baby because I don't love my partner. It tears me apart. Man and Woman Making Love in Bed. Girl Isits on Her Partner, He Turning I do not know the answer to that. Only knowing that you don't feel good with your current situation won't make any change unless you do. I know quite a few mothers who weren't ready (not that anyone ever is) to have a baby when they did and just grew to resent their child. Good luck to you. So remember to try to be the best of you. THAT'S IT. as expected the women are been overly sentimental, ganging up on the guy insulting, and throwing reason out the window. bumboclaath mi nuh hv any advice fi u.battybwoy! Want to have sex but not babies? Congratulations, you're like most I feel bad for you but you basically gave him the green light to control you. THE TRUTH IS THAT NO MATTER LOVE CANNOT BE FORCED. 37 weeks today. To cut a long story short I'm in a very My Pregnant Girlfriend is Pushing Me Away. I need help moving on. My Best Friend's Daughter Called ME Daddy While I Popped Her Cherry "Once you cross that line, look for life to get easier in every way. Nobody really knows what to expect when having a baby, but it does change everything, even if you're determined it won't. Some people may view the prospect of that change as scary and they may doubt their parental skills." But that luxury comes with an expiration date, especially for women. 1997-2023 BabyCenter, LLC, a Ziff Davis company. Where are you from? Opinions please. What was even worst she call me two days later to ask me if I could pick her up and I did. Find advice, support and good company (and some stuff just for fun). This educational content is not medical or diagnostic advice. In the workplace, women with youthful faces are often more successfuland make solid leaders.On the other hand, though, some baby-faced women get passed overfor challenging tasks and leadership roles. Group Leaders arent expected to spend any additional time in the community, and are not held to a set schedule. She knows him for 9 MONTHS not years. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. He is a grown up. Please whitelist our site to get all the best deals and offers from our partners. Be responsible of your act and decision on something. seriously.. i find it hard to understand SOME MEN. JP friend, thanks for taking the time to read my post and offer your advise. I want to love this baby, but I can't shake how I feel. 15 Reasons Some Moms Don't Bond With Their Baby - BabyGaga Hi everyone! A year has passed, we have a beautiful little girl that I love with all my heart, but our marriage life is a disaster. what is de main reason why u do not love her?? 8 Facts About Having a Baby With a Surrogate - Health It is normal to want to lay your head on your mother's breast and feel the security and warmth of her love and compassion. The author playing in the snow in December 2022. The end result was the same my siblings and I had the worse upbringing. Being in a lo. You are in control of your life. U r runnin away from marriage cos u didn love her b4 ?? Group Black's collective includes Essence, The Shade Room and Naturally Curly. It was enough for me to be content, while I gave the kids a life that I never had. I do have family but financially they can't help me or buy me a car bc he would be petty enough to keep the one he got me, it's under his name, I don't have anywhere to go or any Finances since I quit my job moving in with him. Grown apart and have no interest in each others lives! Sooner or later it'll be over. Nobody forces you to live with him, if you really don't like him, you can find a job and leave. Having a baby with someone you don't love. You have to do what you feel is right. cos it not easy to becme a single mother huh. I feel that i have fallen into serious depression and i might seek some professional help. The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of What to Expect. When I did he the. View woman having a baby videos Browse 599,438 woman having a baby stock photos and images available, or search for woman in labor or woman giving birth to find more great stock photos and pictures. If I could take a pill that made me love u him I would, whereas I think he thinks he can start a new life if he left me? I pretended to be. Life will not be easier staying with him. I hope everything works out for you. Group Leaders arent expected to spend any additional time in the community, and are not held to a set schedule. How Having a Baby Affects Your Relationship With Your Partner I would say take a step back and analyze why you are not connecting with him and see if things could be different if you two had some changes. General Baby Shower Wishes And Congratulations. AND THE END OF THE DAY IS ALSO HERS. Use of this site is subject to our terms of use and privacy policy. My friends-with-benefits and I are having a baby (6 months along). Copyright 2017 - 2022 by LoveDevani.com. There are many women out here who will do this if given the chance. If I cant love her now, what are the possibilities that Ill love her? At the end of the day, you won't be able to find happiness that you have been looking for. 8 Tips for Dating a Woman With a Child (From a Guy Who's Been There) FTM. Get a job and find a place to live. I too got burned with the kid trap. By Kate Spencer Published: Apr 27, 2016 UNIVERSAL PICTURES | LAYNEELU/IMGUR AGE 6 I. U dont love her bcos u havent made ur mind to do so the moment u sit down to think about this gurl as a grown man n de future, am sure u start developin love for her and am sure u liked her thats why u slept with her what makes u slept with her?? We only dated for three months before I got pregnant. After all, what is marriage if there is no happiness? Privacy Policy. Would I do it again? my point is no one really wins in this situation. When I had my first baby as a young single mom, I didn't have a car and I figured it out with the help of my family. And 3 children. Tell her at home and in private. Leaving a pregnant girlfriend with your child, in my view is very selfish and irresponsible. Good one boys real mature!! 37 weeks today. AS to your ex, is she still into you, or is it one-sided? We literally virtually broke up the night before! I do want to be a father but i always imagined it different, like being with a woman that i am in love with. YOU CANNOT PROVIDE HAPPINESS WHEN YOU ARE NOT HAPPY. He shdnt forget the welfare of the child involved. As for my girlfriend, I love this person and i will do my best to make it work out. @jessi, LMFAOI like ur commentVery BLUNT and to the POINT. Ex gf keeps driving past my house!!? Learn more about, Realizing I Had PPD After Returning to Work as a Soldier in the U.S. Army, Planned c section too presumptuous??? 8 Insults No Woman Ever Deserves (Stop Them Immediately) - Bolde They hurt the most. After all, a 70-year-old guy can still have kids. I talked with him about how we had to stop thinking about ourselves and trying to hurt each other. LoveDevani is an independent website. Hey I know exactly how you feel. He's provided for me financially, has given me a house and a car, and is really into being a father. I know daddies who didn't feel a connection to their babies until they held them for the first time and like someone else said, maybe that'll be the case for you. First, she's too far along. Sucked it up and did what I had to do for my kids. dont do it I married my ex for the same reasons it was terrible for not only us but my children. Girlfriend Brokeup while pregnant. Many things will change during the whole 9 months of pregnancy. Sounds like she was looking for a sugar daddy and ended up getting pregnant. With the lowest fertility rate in the . What kept us together is our deep friendship and and our ability to communicate. It's his car, it's not petty if he keeps it. NOW THE CHILD IS BORN. It stressed us kids out like you wouldn't believe, all the kids are dysfunctional, serious trust issues. If she says she doesn't want the relationship then that's fine but if a man says he doesn't then that's selfish. Sadly having a baby can create a rift between parents. Thank you for purchase! I got pregnant with a 34 year old man with another baby and I'm only 19 we've know each other 3 months now but only knew each other a couple weeks when we found out. Even when you first meet your new child, don't put expectations on how you should feel. there will be hatred, resentment, and misery. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. DO YOU WANT TO CHILD TO HAVE A MESSED UP UPBRINGING LIKE YOU DID? You have to remember you are only going to be a victim for as long as you allow yourself to be one. I FEEL SORRY FOR THE GIRL INVOLVED. THE CHILD UNSTABLE, EVEN MORE **** UP. SHE DESERVES A SAYING IN THIS! Learn more about. We were fighting like crazy right before we found out she was pregnant. Also, don't give her a dime of your money towards the baby until you find out if it's yours. Start off by talking about your family, how you're feeling about work and home in general, and your love for your wife. Send all yourrelationship&Loveproblems/issues to me for help via [emailprotected]. Archived discussions are usually a bit older and not as active as other community content. You wouldn't happen to be burning a bra right about now would you? You are right it is not fair to her. Long story short: we've togheter Long distance girlfriend pregnant and is thinking about breaking up. I'm sorry this is long but I have no one else. Long story short, I don't love my pregnant girlfriend. My pregnant girlfriend doesnt seem to want me around. Just not with her. 'Don't expect rewards in love': woman, 32, who desperately wants a baby says she dated 100 men in a year, renewing marriage pressure debate in China A woman went on more than 100 dates. Ex My moving on process. Aside from personal decision to have an unwanted relationship and questioning such question of having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it, we will need to be responsible. There is no right way to be a parent there is the only way that you want to do it. He's not all bad. You may want to consider marriage counseling talk to your pastor, priest whatever. And remember, folks who don't want kids don't want kids. But I want to be a father. Man up and take care of your kid, but UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES can you let her, or her family, or your family guilt trip you into "doing the right thing" and marrying her. This difficult parent-child dynamic is most typical of families where one or both parents are narcissistic, but it's not exclusive to narcissists only. (1 to 2 kg . SCENARIO 3: FORGET ABOUT THE WOMAN YOU LOVE. And I still do. (11 Possible Meanings), how do I deal with a break up while I am still pregnant his baby, reasons you should know and love yourself before you love someone else, How to Sweep A Cancer Man Off His Feet - Zodiac Signs, 32 Best Reasons to Date a Nurse (The No.1 Caretaker), Things You Need to Know About Dating Portuguese Man (The Sexiest Boyfriend), 35 Crazy and Undeniable Signs That She Friendzoned You, 25 Reasons Why You Should Date The Outgoing Introvert, Reasons to Choose the Girl with the Complicated Pastand How to Love Her Right. This is nuts. He has been nothing but supportive, but I do not love him. Ex GIrlfriend blocked me out of the blue! She will touch you in a gentle way, kiss you softly and hug you with her heart. Does it feels good to fake your feelings? Its best to rip the band-aid off now instead of living a miserable life indefinitely. Don't stay just for the kids. I am wondering if i can and how i can win my ex back. Having A Baby With Someone You Don't Want To Be With, How To Deal With It? NOW YOU WONT BE ALWAYS PHYSICALLY THERE, BUT BECUASE YOU ARE A HAPPY PERSON THAT WILL TRANSLATE THAT. To start? The Preferential Parent. Having children is not cheap. Eventually I grew to love him, but not the fairy tale kind of love. the guy might turn into a psychopath and malevolent towards the girl.he would also probably turn into a serial cheater and wife beater which is usually what happens. marrying that girl would even be a bigger mistake and problem than the first one. You could split amicably and try to remain friends to do what's best for the child. Firstly, I am sending my regards to you all. And one of the problems is the appearance of a question having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it? In the end its all about the kids. THE MOTHER KNOWS THE FATHER DOESNT LOVE HER NOW GUESS WHAT SHE IS ALSO MISARABLE! To begin, the average cost of vaginal delivery in the US, with health insurance, is $4,300. The man I am pregnant by has been in my life for years and is a good man but I am not in love with him. This is reason why i always advice Ladies that they need to STOP creating soul ties by sexing guys Sex isnt better than love its about time you Let the men know in upfront that you are not having sex before marriage. If you don't like him, you don't have to live with him or use him. Okay so long story very short my ex gi Long story short, My current girlfriend keeps in contact wit Long story short. We had been dating for maybe a few months before exclusive. Not that it matters - if you have feelings for someone else, you can't be in love with your gf so sounds like leaving is the right decision, as staying together for a child with someone you don't love never works out in the long run. *I also grew up in a home where my parents were unhappy. I do feel sorry for you and the situation you are in. GET A DNA TEST AS SOON AS THE CHILD IS BORN!!! I want to be a father!!! Sex can lead to pregnancy and I'm assuming you knew the possibility of pregnancy when you made the choice. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. Having a baby with someone you don't love - What to Expect I just need to vent and I thought this would be a good place to do it. The educational health content on What To Expect is reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts to be up-to-date and in line with the latest evidence-based medical information and accepted health guidelines, including the medically reviewed What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff. Wasn't looking for a sugar daddy. Perhaps you never talked about having a baby with your partner, or maybe you vaguely mentioned wanting kids "someday." You might've even agreed to try getting pregnant at 25 (or 30 or. start communicatin with her without quarrellin give her a try n am sure things gonna work out Or r u afraid u wont be able to sleep around or play ur games wen she step into urlife dear dwag such life n face reality. we ended u divorcing in 6 years anyway. back out now, "Leaving a pregnant girlfriend with your child, in my view is very selfish and irresponsible. I can't bear the thought of breaking up and not being a part to this child's upbringing. But, then again, falling in love is always phenomenal and terrifying. Only good thing that came out of it are my children. Sex is the leading cause of babies. Yes, you can still be happy in a relationship without being married. Not. But I don't feel the need to hold that up as a shield (though every time I see a movie where the childless woman is the villain I understand why my fellow non-parents doth protest too much . After a while it was better but even now when we get into arguments he's so controlling and condescending it just makes me like him less and less. Please specify a reason for deleting this reply from the community. Source these things out and make a plan to leave. To help you make the fewest blunders possible, let me give you a few tips: 1. K lemme get one thing straight. If you feel a message or content violates these standards and would like to request its removal please submit the following information and our moderating team will respond shortly. go and apologise. Also, you must then decide if you want to be in the child's life, how you will coordinate co-parenting a kid when you're not in a relationship, etc. And Maggie Makes Three - Wikipedia Please, please do not have an abortion like somebody commented. You need to get in contact with services and leave. To not make the problem goes worse, be responsible for your unwanted partner and the baby. Group Black's collective includes Essence, The Shade Room and Naturally Curly. My Boyfriend Wants To Have A Baby With Another Woman